I hate me so much,
it's the biggest selfhate I've ever had so far
I think.
My mother is such a beast sometimes.
She says things,
disgusting and really hurtful things.
And this is the reason why I hate
her so deeply. Sometimes.
I don't want her to be my mother.
On one day she pretends like she's caring so much,
and the other day she behaves like a monster
with red eyes.
And she doesn't even cares about that!
Sometimes I think she's the one who needs
a therapist, who's not happy with herself
and with her life.
Because she can hurt people that much
and sometimes it feels like it's just fun to her.
I hate her, I hate me,
sometimes I just hate the entire world.
And this is the point where I stop eating.
Where I stop caring about myself and
about my life.
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